The most profound demonstration of confidence is the act of letting go.
The most confident people among us have one thing in common, they’ve learned to let go of the outcome. In other words, they’re happy and successful regardless of the result they get. If what they’re striving to achieve works as hoped, wonderful!
They feel precisely the same way when things don’t work as planned. Why? Because they learned something. They know that lessons learned are valuable, and as such, are simply another form of success and another source of happiness.
To some, this attitude seems Polyannaish or delusional because it flies in the face of what our intuition suggests.
Intuitively we presume that we’re successful when things go according to plan…when we get the result we desire. The flip side of that coin is the belief that we fail when we don’t get the desired result.
This is one instance in which our intuition doesn’t serve us well. Indeed, these definitions of success and failure are the source of much of fear, anxiety and frustration we experience. They’re also the source of stress that damages our health and well being.
Obviously these are not experiences we enjoy or desire, so what’s the alternative?
It’s the counterintuitive mindset of those who free themselves…let go…of the outcome. In doing so, they free themselves of the fear, anxiety, frustration and debilitating stress the intuitive approach inflicts upon those who embrace it.
Developing this counterintuitive approach requires you to retrain your mind to realize that you are successful and happy regardless of the outcome. As you enjoy success, joy and enhanced confidence in everything you do…in every dream you pursue…you position yourself to enjoy a long, healthy, happy life.
The question is “How do I train my mind to let go of the outcome?”
Before embarking on an activity…one in which you hope to get a specific outcome…pause a moment and remind yourself that if things go as you hope, you win. But if they don’t, and you learn something from the experience, you still win.
This simple act of reminding yourself that you will win regardless of the outcome will help you set aside your fears and anxiety AND avoid the frustration that would normally arise when your expectations aren’t met.
For our kids
As your kids express their fears, their anxiety, their frustration, remind them that it’s not the outcome that determines whether they’ve succeeded or failed, but whether or not they learned something from the experience.
More importantly, live that message and your kids are likely to emulate your behavior and embrace your messages. Over time you’ll all learn to let go and, in doing so, experience joy and success regardless of the outcome.