I’m not suggesting that confident people aren’t caring, but that they don’t care about things that keep many of us awake at night. To avoid confusion, let’s explore each of these topics separately.
Caring
Confident people are caring people. They care about the welfare of others. Their confidence enables them to enjoy the life they choose and they want others to experience that joy as well. It’s one of the hallmarks of confident people.
Let’s not confuse confident people with those who have been successful financially, yet are miserable in most other aspects of their lives. I’ve known people with mid six-figure incomes that I’ve never seen smile or are in constant need of others’ approval. It’s difficult for people who are suffering these emotional voids to find the wherewithal to care about others.
Don’t care
Having said that confident people don’t care about what others think about them.
They don’t care that:
| Others values and beliefs differ from theirs. | They respect everyone’s right to their beliefs. |
| The outcome may not be what they expected or hoped it would be. | They know that they’ll win regardless of the outcome. |
| Others believe them to be overly-optimistic (Pollyannaish). | They know that confidence makes everything possible. |
| Others aren’t interested in what they have to offer. | They recognize that people have different interests and are at different levels of personal development which precludes their offerings from being attractive to everyone. |
| They currently don’t have the background, skills, resources to achieve what they desire. | They know that they’ll find a way to get what they need. |
| The clock is ticking. | They know that big goals often require a decade or more to achieve. |
| Their dreams may not be fulfilled. | They realize that joy is in the pursuit…and, at the end of their days, there will be unfulfilled dreams. |
| They can’t come up with a solution immediately. | They know how to tap into their subconscious mind to solve any problem they face. |
In other words, confident people don’t worry. When doubts, fear, anxiety or frustration surface, they know that these are emotional reactions that can be quickly set aside. This knowledge enables them to return to a worry-free state…a state of not caring.
For you
Print out the table above. Keep it handy. When you find yourself in doubt, fearful, anxious or frustrated, review the table above to remind yourself that everything is going to be okay. That your confidence in your ability to learn and adapt will see you successfully through any challenge you face.
For our kids
Give your kids a copy of the table. When you see them experiencing negative emotions remind them to review the table. Help them recall challenges they previously faced and dealt with successfully. And don’t forget to live the message…it’s the most powerful way to teach.
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