I don’t remember the source, but I recall hearing that change is fun…if you’re the one initiating it.
The accuracy of that statement always brings a smile to my face. Yet all too often we deprive ourselves of the right to choose. We blame circumstances, we blame others, but the reality is that it’s often we who are preventing ourselves from initiating change.
One of the things that prevents us from initiating change is that we anticipate others’ reaction to our desire to change. It manifests itself in statements that begin with “I’d like to…, but:”
- My spouse wants [something different].
- I’d feel guilty for [impact on others].
- I don’t have the money.
- I don’t have the time.
- I don’t have the experience.
- My boss won’t let me…
- It’s another dream that won’t come true.
What we’re doing is anticipating others’ reactions, or circumstances, and converting them to our reality. They’re not. They’re OUR creations. Yet we choose to allow our creations to stand in the way of what we want.
The key to getting beyond this tendency to convert anticipation into obstacle is to realize that we’ve created these obstacles and we can just as easily remove them.
Your subconscious mind can be a great aid in removing self-created obstacles. When you feel that something is getting in the way of what you want, ask your subconscious mind:
- How can I achieve both my and my spouse’s desires?
- How can I have what I want and still provide a favorable experience for those who will be impacted by my choice?
- How can I get the money (or income stream) I need to achieve what I want?
- How can I free up the time I need to be able to do what I love?
- How can I learn what I need to learn so that I can take on the role I desire?
- How can I gain my boss’s interest in letting me expand my involvement in the company?
- How can I get out of the habit of foregoing my dreams?
The answers to these questions will generate excitement that comes from your ability to see a path to what you desire. That excitement will be further fueled as you grow closer and closer to your goal, to what you want, to what makes you happy.
You’ll feel less a victim and more in control of your life because you are initiating change. You’re not waiting for someone else’s permission. You initiate change by simply seeking a path to your realizing your dreams. You continue to drive change as you move closer and closer to your goal. As obstacles arise you adapt (change) to overcome these obstacles.
At every step of the journey, you are the one initiating the change which means you’re having fun. There are few things in life as fun as the pursuit of something that interests and excites you. When you finally realize your dream another surfaces almost immediately, signally that it’s time once again to change. Because you’ve been so successful changing, you no longer fear change, you choose to change for all the joy it affords.
The next time you feel trapped, recognize that it’s a trap of your own creation. Then ask yourself:
- What obstacles have I created for myself?
- How can I remove these obstacles while also enriching the lives of those I love?
- When the answer arrives, take action!
- Let the joy and excitement you experience sustain you as you continue your journey to what you desire, what you love to do.
For our kids
When your kids create reasons why their dreams will never come true, ask them “What would you need to do to make that happen? Is it important enough to you to find a way to overcome whatever it is that stands in your way?”
Then remind them that you are absolutely certain that if they want it badly enough, they’ll find a way to make it happen. Leave them to their own devices to find that way to what they want. They’ll be emotionally stronger and happier for having discovered the solution on their own.
I love hearing your thoughts and experiences, please share your wisdom as a comment below.
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