This program takes only 7 weeks. Each weekly session takes no more than 30 minutes plus a 15-minute daily exercise.
In that small time investment, you and your kids will discover the secrets to overcoming six natural tendencies that plague us all by virtue of our humanity. As a result you’ll see things others don’t see and, in the process, gain tremendous influence.
The seventh week is devoted to teaching you and them how to evaluate opportunities. For with influence comes opportunity.
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Call Dale at 314-707-3771 to ATTRACT opportunities instead of pursuing them.
GAINING THE ADMIRATION OF OTHERS
Who among us wouldn’t like to be recognized as a person of great wisdom? Imagine what it would be like to have people saying of you:
- You don’t think like other people do.
- You see the world differently than other people do.
- You see things other people don’t see.
- Yet what you say makes perfect sense.
In Stand Out From The Crowd you’ll discover six natural tendencies that get in the way of your and your child’s success. Six tendencies that, when overcome, not only gain you the admiration of others, but open the doors to countless opportunities for you and your child. No longer will you or your child have to pursue opportunities, you’ll ATTRACT them.
THE PERSUASION MYTH
One of these natural tendencies is our desire to persuade others of our way of thinking. The reality is that we can’t persuade anyone of anything, they have to persuade themselves. Indeed, a simple statement of fact has a 75% chance of being resisted.
If you doubt that, you’ve just proven my point. Here are the possible scenarios a statement of fact can generate and the resistance each creates:
- I make a statement of fact and you have the same facts. No problem, you’ll readily accept my statement.
- I make a statement of fact and you have a different set of facts. Not only are you likely to resist my idea, you’ll probably try to persuade me that I’m wrong.
- I make a statement of fact and you don’t like the facts. It’s not that I’m wrong, it’s just that you’re unwilling to acknowledge the facts. Again, I’ll get resistance from you.
- I make a statement of fact and you don’t have the background or experience to either verify or refute my fact. In essence, I’m asking you to trust me and trusting others when we have no way to verify information is not something we do readily. You’re going to resist what I’m telling you.
As you can see, a simple statement of fact has a 75% chance of being resisted.
What if there were a way that you could influence others’ thinking without creating resistance? The good news is that you can.
Here’s the secret. Allow ideas to come to you in the form they normally do…as statements of fact. Before you express that thought pause a moment and add a phrase that converts your idea to a question. Here are some examples to help you visualize this approach:
- Instead of stating a fact, ask “Is it true that…?”
- Instead of issuing instructions, ask “What would happen if…?”
- Instead of disagreeing with what the person said, ask “How would that work in this [situation]?” or “How would that work when…?”
- Instead of expressing an opinion, ask “What would happen if…”
In each of these examples you allow others to discover the answer on their own. As they make that discovery, they validate their conclusions with their own experiences. That’s how they persuade themselves.
A few more keys to help you enjoy greater success with this approach:
- Make the tone of your question exploratory. Questions that have a challenging tone create as much, if not more, resistance than a statement of fact.
- Be open to the possibility that you’re the one who is missing some information. Being open to the possibility that you’re wrong helps make the tone of your question exploratory.
- Be comfortable with the fact that you’re sharing credit for the discovery with someone else. The vast majority of people will credit you with helping them make the discovery.
Teaching your child
As you become more adept at overcoming these tendencies, your child will pick up on them and use them to their own advantage.
A CEO that I coached on the Stand Out From The Crowd principles, called one day. He was laughing as he said “Dale, you’re going to love this. My 10-year old son and I were driving down the road in my pickup truck when he asked ‘Dad, did you ever do anything really stupid?'”
The CEO said “Yes, son I have. What did you do?” His son told him. The dad asked “What should you have done?” His son told him. The dad asked “How are you going to fix it?” His son’s solution was spot on.
What had amazed this dad/CEO was that he’d never discussed the persuasion myth with his son. His son had mimicked the behavior from simply observing his dad’s success using the questioning approach. You children will and do mimic your behavior. They pick up much more by observing us than we realize.
Influence and opportunity
As you overcome the six natural tendencies that plague us all by virtue of our humanity, you’ll:
- Gain the admiration of others.
- Gain tremendous influence with all you meet.
- Attract opportunities instead of pursuing them. By the way, the 7th step in helps you evaluate the opportunities you’ll generate by virtue of your wisdom.
- Provide examples of how your child can in a way others admire.